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Read "Feel It All"

Here's why I'm a sex therapist AND educator.

I've been on a mission to decode good sex ed because so many of my patients (including myself) didn't receive it growing up. And it's hurting us.

Sex therapy is often needed because we had poor sex ed. I believe that if we all had good sex ed growing up, we would be in a much better place.

I am in recovery from bad sex ed, and so are you. If this is news to you—if you didn’t know you needed intimacy rehab—you’re in good company. Most of us never received proper sex ed, and we didn't even know it in the first place. In fact, most of us are in denial because we don't understand how poor sex ed has failed us.

Most of us learned that trauma is an extreme, life-threatening event like war, so it’s no wonder so many of us hear the word “trauma” and think it doesn’t apply to us. It’s not a surprise we are skilled at invalidating experiences that don’t feel “extreme enough” to be considered worth attending to or worth seeking healing from.

For many of us, bad sex ed (or no sex ed) is one of these traumas we invalidate. You may wonder, can something be a trauma if it happens to almost everyone? Just because bad sex ed occurs on a mass level does not preclude it from being traumatic. Just because it happened to almost everyone doesn’t mean it was okay when it happened to you.

Why am I so extra about this? Because I sit with people at rock bottom for a living. I provide psychotherapy to people who are at their wits end with the negative impact of bad sex ed on their lives—people who are in broken relationships with loved ones, themselves, and their bodies.

Part of our collective healing is recognizing how bad sex ed hurt us. Wherever this blog finds you on your journey in recovering from this trauma, we're in it together.